Marrena,

I have no problem with my "sex drive". When my boyfriend and I are together I want nothing more than to physically be "with" him. In fact I'm kind of the opposite, I want it probably more than he does. We're older than the norm, I'm 38 and he's 45, but I don't feel different than when I was younger, maybe more creaking bones and sore muscles, but the mind is the same.

My problem is that he normally starts with oral clitoral stimulation but then complains that I don't respond. I say that it feels good, but that is something that I can't fake. Is this possibly due to his inability to do it "right" or is this something that maybe your diet can fix for me?

As I said, I'd love for nothing else but to make my boyfriend happy by me having an orgasm, but we're still in the process of selecting the proper birth control that we both can deal with. I will NOT go on the pill (or any other hormone emitting drugs) and he refuses to wear a condom. (He's a bit touchy about his penis size, I myself don't see the problem) So, until now, we're doing it the old fashioned way, which means he finishes before I do; and with no clitoral orgasm that I seem to be lacking, I'm left frustrated.

So, do you think your book can help me (along with some good birth control)? I know that if we were left to "complete the deed" so to speak, I would indeed have a vaginal orgasm. I start responding just about when he's ready to pull out.

Help!
Thanks

Yes, if you are already having vaginal orgasms then my diet will most certainly help you have them faster, particularly if you do the PC muscles exercises.

But why on earth aren't you just using a diaphragm or a cervical cap? What on earth is wrong with doctors nowadays! Much safer than pulling out!

It's not the doctor's fault, it's my fault. Haven't been to the Doctor in about 4 years for that. I have a big gyno phobia and only go when I need birth control. I know, I know, I'm bad. I just met the new man about 3 months ago and I wanted to wait until I was sure this was worth more than an occasional condom. Before him, it had been about 3 1/2 years without! (I'm amazed myself.)

Right now I'm looking into a better form of birth control and I believe I've found it. I've been researching the IUD. But until then I will go and get some alternate birth control. I'm not too keen playing this game of Russian Roulette.

Thanks for the encouragement. I believe I'll buy myself that book for Xmas.

Make sure to get a non-hormonal IUD! There are some with hormones added, like the Mirena. Makes no sense to me.

I recommend the Paraguard IUD(the non-hormonal one) I have it, so glad I never have to use hormonal birth control again! It lasts 10 years but you can get it taken out whenever, so that's cool. The only negatives is that it can make your period a bit heavier and have more cramping, also the first few months are weird, takes a bit for your body to get used to it. Trust me though, pull out is not good, I used it for a few years until I ended up getting pregnent from it.