Hi there gals/guys!

I'm with my girl for over 9 months. She orgasmed (vaginaly) on the first sex we had. It was also the first time in 3 years of her active sex life that she had an orgasm from penetration. She says she's never been even close to one. Her attitude toward sex and then love was quite bad before because of her previous experiences with men. But then of course I came with all my manly qualities (really) and opened her heart for all the good things (tender love) and unlocked her great healthy sexual potential.

But after about 4 times of having sex I noticed she almost cannot continue after she has an vaginal orgasm. Then she asked me to do her clitoraly after I gave her a vaginal. I was curious about what's going on and she told me when she does have a vaginal it actually feels weak and her lust for penetration falls down and penetration itself doesn't feel good. She says it's thousand times better while doing it doggy style (rubbing also the sensitive nerves in this position) which is quite logical.

So i'm here to ask you if it's really normal to feel this way because I don't beleive it should be this way. There are definitely ways to change it but before this I guess I have to understand this mechanism. So gals.. vaginal orgasms.. what's wrong with them?? Even 10 vaginals cannot compare to 1 clitoral?? So what kind of orgasm during sex should a woman have to feel satistfied?

Well let me see. For me personally... the ultimate would be maybe fifty or so vaginal orgasms, a clitoral orgasm and a heart chakra orgasm.

Happy?

Vaginal orgasms are extra. They do not let you off the hook. If you are really curious about the difference between vaginal and clitoral orgasms, the corresponding orgasm in men to the vaginal orgasm is the prostate orgasm.

Usually women can have multiple vaginal orgasms no problem, but not all women. Some women are satisfied with one vaginal orgasm. Usually women's clitoral orgasm capacity is not as high as men's orgasmic capacity, so having vaginal orgasms on a woman's off days can help her feel satisfied during sex.

If this is cutting into your sex time and you are finding that she finishes before you, you may want to try the coital alignment technique. This is a way to give her clitoral stimulation during penetration. Since it's riding high it's less likely to give her a vaginal orgasm, and then when she's had a clitoral orgasm you can finish up and give her a vaginal orgasm doggy style.

Thanks Zane

I'm slowly getting the picture. And i'm also getting a picture how to make things better. I love her very much and I'm thinking of spending life with her so in order to secure a large % of hapiness, calibrating sex is a must. She suggested to check out tantra filed and after reading some things (not looking about the large % of mumbojumbo in it) it definitely looks like one of the few ways how to make sex into something really enjoyable and satisfying. Now don't take me wrong our sex is the bomb but even though we somehow feel something is missing. We have very high libidos which we should be able to control and be able to transform the energy into something beautiful and satisfying.

We have ALOT of this energy. We have our own small ritual of getting so horny that we loose control. The energy is IN but now we should learn how to use it properly But something is definitely missing at the moment .. and we'll find out soon

Margo Anand has some good books out that aren't too woo-woo. And if you can ignore the woo, The Jewel in the Lotus has some good practical information underneath the flowery language.

Thanks Zane i'm already looking into it

I really learned my lesson. To have the real complete "sex" takes alot of patience and hard work. Our sex sometimes brings me to tears so good it feels. It not only feels good but it feels so "right". I've changed alot with my girl and so did she.

Just poped in to say thanks Zane. The coital alignment technique is the bomb. I gave it a go last time becase we were so horny and it worked like magic. Then after 30 minutes of beautiful love making and her 5 orgasms (1 in coital, 3 doggy/lying behind style and 1 classic missionary) we fell asleep in a hug position. Aww so cute

I'm so pleased. Thanks for the feedback!

Sex is such an interesting topic. I'm now reading stuff from Mantak Chia (cultivating aroussal response in both female and male, multiorgasms, real lovemaking, hmmm) and also David Shade's manual (quite a pervert isn't he.. but has some very good points).

I was always wondering why my inner me felt so stupid after having sex with someone I didn't love (happened 3 times). The sex was ok but there was something missing. Fucking and lovemaking is something so different. Who the hell said lovemaking can't be much more exciting than just fucking. I guess people have it totaly wrong. What also struck me that why I was having much stronger orgasms when I masturbated while thinking of my girl (before we started dating). And why my orgasms during sex are so strong with her and they feel so good and so pure.

Ah the ideal sex. Seems that many people loosed their minds because of the orgasm hunt and fell into the perversion category. Super strong orgasms just doesn't mean great sex. Sex without love seems so inferior and humiliating. Like you're doing something completly wrong that hurts you. And it definitely does. Well nature set the boundaries. So we pay if we cross them :P

Well I have to take care not to loose mind and always have that good inner feeling. A whole new world of sex is opening for me. Have to follow a safe route

Thanks again Zane and be carefull not to overdo it

Ah Grasshopper, you are far along the path already.

And don't worry about me--if anything I'm underdoing the it.

This path doesn't seem to have an end. And that's good. If we knew where it ends it would be boring. And every step on this path is filled with joy.

Damn I was so wrong before. I never thought things were designed this way. It almost makes me puke how wrong I was and that I didn't listen to my inner instincts.

My girl had alot of trouble with men. She's 24 and all the guys she had always left her hurt in some way. I don't want to be cruel but thanks to their messed up little heads they could have left her as wasted goods. She was living in a bad dream. I'm so happy that i'm atleast somehow helpful in ending that bad dream. I wish one day when she will think about her past she would only laugh as if it only happened in a really bad dream. She was just a too good girl for this world.

I'm totaly disgusted with men. Where have all the qualities of men gone?? Why do men act worse than animals?? Why does a big % of male population is slowly becoming bisexual (my friend who is working on his sexuology license has a good theory on this). Even my friends started to act like total idiots. Seriously sick of this world. But i'm not going to let anything get in my path

Now I speak like a pesimistic goon. I always resolve things with logic and a smile on my lips. Impossible is a word only for the weak ones.